When it comes to upper body strength, athletic ability, and eyesight, this writer was born in the shallow end of the gene pool. Since scrawny, awkward kids with thick glasses are prime […]
A Most-Notable Bevy of Scurvy-Laden Shakespearean Insults
Did an Indian King Use Rolls Royces to Collect Garbage?
Have you heard about the fabulously wealthy Indian ruler who was snubbed at a Rolls Royce showroom? When the salesman did not recognize the distinguished visitor and dismissed him as someone who […]
Vinegar Valentines — When You Care Enough to Send Something Truly Insulting
The Victorian era is remembered for its civility and good manners. Valentine’s Day cards are synonymous with love and affection. Theoretically, that period should have produced nothing but elegant, heart-warming cards that […]
How George Washington Turned An Enemy Into a Friend With An Apology
Not many people could boast of having knocked down the Father of the Country, but that wasn’t the primary thing William Payne remembered about his famous tussle with George Washington.
Lincoln Gets Burned By Red-Hot Stove Story
No one appreciated a funny story better than Abraham Lincoln. Whenever he heard something that made him chuckle, he filed the story away in his memory to use again when the opportunity […]
A Posthumous Jab at a Favorite Team
Many people are lifelong sports fans. For some, their dedication is so strong that it carries on past death, including the need to get in one last dig against their favorite team.
Churchill and the French Bathing Llama
Winston Churchill and Charles de Gaulle were far from being close friends. When the French general got on the Prime Minister’s nerves, he wasn’t reluctant to express his irritation in the form […]
A Kiss on All Four Cheeks
Winston Churchill and Charles De Gaulle had a difficult relationship, at best. Churchill viewed the French general as a spoiled child who always demanded his own way. On one occasion Churchill was […]
Des Moines: the City That Got Its Name from a Practical Joke
The city of Des Moines is a jewel in the middle of Iowa. With skyscrapers breaking up the monotony of the prairie horizon and the gold-domed Iowa State Capitol building reflecting the […]
The Difference Between Sin and Error
When an actress asked Father Mugnier if it was a sin for her to look at herself naked in a mirror, the priest gave a cursory glance at her decidedly unfit figure […]
Beauty is Only Wrinkle-Deep
“His forehead was so wrinkled, he had to screw his hat on.” — Carlton Alsop source: Jarski, R. (2008). Dim wit: the funniest, stupidest things ever said (p. 452). London: Ebury.
“The Fork” Dishes Up Colorful Insult
Søren Kierkegaard earned the nickname “The Fork” in his youth, due to his ability to identify an opponent’s weaknesses and stick it to him. Generally this took the form of surgical strikes […]
A Idiot In Scotland Might Find Himself Kilt
You can tell a lot about what concerns people by looking at their language. Eskimos have many words for snow. The ancient Greeks had six words for love. It doesn’t take a […]
Andrew Lloyd Webber: No Beauty Contestant
“Can you watch Andrew Lloyd Webber? He looks like he’s had his face carved off by a diseased butcher. Put in a piñata. Beaten with hockey sticks for six hours, and […]
With Friends Like This, Who Needs Enemies?
“He has no enemies, but he is intensely disliked by his friends.” — Oscar Wilde
Commonplace Fun Facts 